I Dance in the Dark

The air is getting humid with the growing crowd. The theatre silences as the soft melancholy music starts to play. Curtains lift, darkness prevails, and silence intensifies.

The slow tune skips a beat, and the spotlight beams sharply - inches away from me.

Standing beside me in a graceful pose is the star of the night.

As the music picks pace, she starts to dance, with a smile on her face, eyes lit with energy and enthusiasm. I make my moves too, but the light hasn't touched me yet. I dance in the dark.

I don't have to remember to keep my arms at an angle when I raise them, nor do I have to count and wait to drop them when the music falls. I don't require conscious efforts to dance after years of practice. But my trained eyes remain on her.

My eyes follow her as she paces across the stage with the spotlight and crowd's eyes chasing her. She goes around to every stretch of the stage like she owns the scene, the spotlight and the crowd. And I go behind her like she holds me too.

I was there years ago, dancing in the spotlight brightly. Being the centre of attention. Being the queen of the land.

"We need to give a chance to the new artists. You realise, don't you?" the instructor had told, smiling encouragingly. "I understand. It's time to give way", I had said.

What I hadn't told was, "It's heavy to have someone replace me. To see someone own my stage. To see someone steal my claps."

And what she hadn't told me was, "You are not young anymore. You cannot be the number-one forever."

My mind knows, but my heart will not understand.

It wants to be distinct, to be irreplaceable, to remain under the spotlight.

How can I not be important anymore?

The sound of cheer distracts me, and I realise the song is over. The curtain drops with me still in the dark.

Maybe,

Stars shouldn't age.

They should die out.